Empowering Women - A Path to Prosperity

It is a fact according to the World Bank that "Low gender gaps are directly correlated with high economic competitiveness." What does this mean for most of the world? Basically the higher the rates of gender equality a nation has, the higher the social and economic status that nation will have.


 January 5, 2011

"In many ways 2010 was the year of women in American politics: Female candidates were among the most visible in the midterm congressional elections, and more women became governors than ever before. In our country, women have a prominent voice in the debates that matter: political, economic and social.

But in much of the developing world the story is different...In these countries, women often lack essential legal and social rights, such as the right to own land or access credit on the same terms as men.
The key insight of the report is this: Empowering women is absolutely crucial in the fight against poverty.


When women are empowered to go to school, enter the workforce, be entrepreneurs, own property and get reliable access to credit, they not only invest in their businesses, they invest in their children's health, nutrition and education. In other words, they invest in the future.

According to the World Bank, "Only 20 out of 128 economies surveyed have equal legal rights for men and women in several important areas for entrepreneurs and workers." Of the 20 economies with equal legal rights, only one is located in sub-Saharan Africa: Botswana.

In a number of African countries -- including Rwanda, Cameroon and Togo -- men have the legal right to forbid their wives to work. This means that in virtually all of sub-Saharan Africa, and in much of the developing world, half the population has a more difficult and costly time starting and operating a business or a farm than the other half.

Taken together, these constraints help us understand why 70 percent of the world's poor are women.

Creating change is difficult, especially in the face of a hostile legal and regulatory environment or, perhaps more challenging, when confronted with tradition or other cultural obstacles that thwart women.

But there is hope.....placing women's empowerment front and center in the human development debate has the potential to pay large dividends, not only for women around the world but for their children. And that will contribute to a brighter future for us all." 

- Author Karol Boudreaux is a senior research fellow at the Mercatus Center, lead researcher for Enterprise Africa and board member of Indego Africa. Ben VanMetre is a master's fellow at the Mercatus Center and George Mason University.


http://www.aolnews.com/2011/01/05/opinion-empowering-women-a-path-to-prosperity/


"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not against your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him and He will make your paths straight." Prov. 5-6

What Are You So Worried About?

Don't Be Anxious

It has been said that anxiety in the heart of men and woman causes depression, but a good word makes it glad. There are too many things in life one can fret about. It is easy to agonize over things like finances, career, and relationships or perhaps even what the future holds. Especially in today's society there is much to be concerned about. Unfortunately our current economy breeds an environment for anxiety.

Sometimes I find myself overly concerned with small things like what to wear out that evening, if my house is clean, or even about something I said to a client that day. These are all examples of things that probably don't really deserve as much attention as they may seem to demand in the pressing moment.

Needless worry is not only hard on the mind, it is hard on the body. It is proven that living a life of worry ages you more quickly physically. So the next time you find yourself worrying about something, whether it's a big deal or something small, ask yourself a few questions.

Questions to Ask Yourself

1. How long have I been stewing over this?

2. Does this situation really deserve the time and energy I have been spending focusing on it?

3. What am I going to solve by hashing and rehashing the situation over and over again in my mind?

4. Am I practicing being peaceful and confident or am I acting overly insecure and anxious?

5. Finally, what is the absolute worst possible outcome of this situation? In the end, is my life or anyone else's at risk here?

Practice Being Peaceful

Is it really as easy as thinking positive thoughts? When overwhelming worry takes over, practice a few things to stop the cycle.

1. Focus on something else. Read, watch a movie, or call up a friend and try chatting about something other than your situation. Try asking them about what's going on in their life. Sometimes just getting our eyes off of ourselves can work wonders.

2. Realize that your anxiety not only affects you. Needless worry can affect those around you and make them not want to be with you, especially if you live a life of constant worry.

3. Yes, think positive thoughts. Stop focusing on the bad and fix your thoughts on all the things in life you are grateful for. Perhaps start speaking out a list of the things you are thankful for. There is always someone worse off than you.

4. Trust that no matter what the outcome is, hopefully one day you will be able to help others through that very situation.

"...do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; or about your body, what you will put on....do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself." Matt. 6:25

NY Woman Held as Sex Slave / FGM

Warning: The following articles are very graphic and intense. Please do not click the links to these two articles if you are sensitive. (I don't want to be a "Debbie Downer" but I do want to talk about real issues that are happening now. I promise that tomorrow I will write about something less intense.)  


National News: Yesterday this was on the front page of MSNBC

Apparently a young woman was looking for housing on Craigslist, but ended up being held in NYC as sex slave for days. Everyone should be extremely careful with Craigslist. DO NOT EVER go to anyone's house alone, to buy or sell anything!

The article is here, but is extremely graphic and intense. Don't read it if you are sensitive to this kind of material. 
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41620089/ns/us_news-crime_and_courts/

Global News: Female Genital Mutilation

Did you KNOW that three million girls face FGM/C (Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting) each year worldwide? Though this practice is mostly prevalent in Africa, globally up to 14o million women and girls have already undergone the practice.

Current 2011 Prevalence Rates (according to United Nations FPA):

• Ethiopia 74%
• Kenya 27%
• Egypt 91%

Current Press Release 2/6/11

Over 6,000 Communities Across Africa Abandon Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting

What is FGM/C?

http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs241/en/

To read a current article from the UNICEF about FGM/C click here: http://www.unfpa.org/public/cache/offonce/home/news/pid/7219

"The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble." 
Ps. 9:9

Female Immigrants

A Ride to the Post Office


Imagine you go to get your nails done, at a local salon...You walk in smelling the strong aroma of nail polish remover and hearing the low murmur of women in the background. There is a Madonna song playing and the only man in the room greets you from behind the counter. "Hello. Manicure? Pedicure?" he asks as he cashes out the woman with the purple things between her toes. "I'll do both this time," you say.


As you sit there in the chair flipping through the latest Glamor Magazine, you realize how much more fun this would have been if your friend didn't have to work through her lunch today. It's too bad she had to cancel last minute, but you were not going to miss out on treating yourself. After all it has been too long and you were really looking forward to this.


"Long or short?" she asks as your feet soak in the blue bubbly water. The young woman with the penciled on eyebrows is now sitting at your feet. She smiles and looks your outfit up and down while she begins to file. Then she mumbles something foreign to her tiny friend on the stool next to her, and of course you pretend not to notice as you flip the next page. The questions start to run through your mind....What are they talking about? Are they talking about me? Where are these women from anyway? I wonder why they came here? 


Perhaps you dig a bit deeper and think to yourself about the girl sitting before you....What was so bad in her own country, that this girl was willing to leave her family and everything she knows, in order to come here and sit at an American woman's feet and dig out the dirt from my nails? I wonder how much money she makes? Certainly not too much more than my tip. 


Meanwhile the girl faithfully scrubs, smiling up at you every now and then thinking...."I wonder what this woman does for a living? "You have husband?" she asks. You answer and continue to read... Then she thinks to herself, about how pretty your highlights are, and wonders what it is like to be an American woman. Her thoughts trail to her family back home....at least I don't have to do that anymore to provide.... Proudly, she thinks....all I need is ten more dollars, then I will send my 5th paycheck to my family this year and they will be able to buy another bicycle and food for three weeks....I wonder if my friend can give me a ride to the post office?"


Current Events: February 14, 2011


Here is an article from the United Nations Population Fund (UNPF):

Highlighting Importance of Women Migrants' Remittances

"...Indeed, women are not just passive players who accompany or join migrating husbands or other family members. Migrant women are in many cases the only contributor to family imcome. Many women increasingly migrate on their own in search of better opportunities for themselves and their families. And they contribute to improvements in the quality of life in both countries of origin and destination.

Every year, migrant women send large sums of money in the form of remittances to feed families, clothe and educate children, support older persons, provide health care and generally improve living standards for families left behind.

In host countries, many migrant women are employed in households of working families, taking care of their children, the elderly and the household. Others contribute technical and professional expertise as teachers, nurses, scientists, technicians and business owners....

...There are also gender differences in the utilization of remittances: women tend to use remittances for daily needs, health care and education while men tend to spend remittance income on consumer items such as cars and televisions, and some for investments such as property or livestock."

Click here to view the article: 

http://www.unfpa.org/public/home/news/pid/7261

"You must not mistreat or oppress foreigners in any way. Remember, you yourselves were once foreigners...." Ex. 22:21

Lyrically Incorrect

Serious Lyrics

This morning I was driving to a meeting when I had a major revelation. I was rocking out to some serious tunage when a repetitive, overplayed song by Taio Cruz came on. "I'm only gonna break, break, break, break, your he-art. I'm only gonna break, break, break, break, your he-art... If you fall for me, I'm not easy to please, I might tear you apart, told you from the start...." he sang as I dodged a blinker-less Mazda on the highway. There may even be another "break, break" in there somewhere, but just in case I missed one, hopefully you know what song I'm talking about.

At some point early to mid song, I changed the station and ironically Kelly Clarkson came on. "Since you've been gone....How come I never hear you say, I just wanna be with you? I guess you never felt that way...."

So here was Taio Cruz warning all the girls, not to fall for him, because he will just tear them apart. After all, he told them from the start. Say whaaat? And then Kelly is yelling through the speakers how she can "finally breathe for the first time" and asking why "he" whoever "he" is, never says "I just wanna be with you."

It Gets Worse....And The Curse Plays Out


In light of my recent post "Barefoot and Pregnant" how do you think this exact example corresponds? I was surprised to see such a clear illustration of "Your desire shall be for your husband..." (Genesis 3:16). So where does that leave us as women? Certainly not all brokenhearted?

There are many songs out there that are degrading of women, some that you may even sing along with. Another example is the song "Get low" by Lil Jon. It says that women should "crawl" and "give me back my doe, go get ya friend...stupid b---- standing there....". Some of the lyrics to this song are so vulgar and degrading that I am unwilling to post them on here.

I am not a prude. Don't get me wrong, I like to "get low" myself when I am dancing, and I like to have fun with the best of them. However, unless women refuse to subject ourselves to this sort of cycle, perhaps things will never change. We will always fight it, until all of us make a stand.

You and I

It wasn't until I caught myself literally singing along with this guy who was warning all the girls, that he would break all their hearts and tear them apart, that I had this profound revelation. I'm not saying that either Lil Jon or Tiao Cruz as artists are good or bad, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I only want to bring this up in order to provoke you to think. Think hard about what you are feeding your feminine spirit on a daily basis.

Does this mean that you or I will never listen to a song that is blatantly degrading of women again? Unfortunately probably not. But I can tell you that I definitely don't want to rush out and promote this kind of stuff by buying a CD or downloading it on my I-Pod.

You and I probably don't have the buying power to put degrading artists out of business but....Perhaps out of a small step in the direction of self-love and self-respect, you might find yourself changing the station from time-to-time.

I would love to know your thoughts on this. Please feel free to post comments.

Happy Valentine's Day To Yourself

You Must First Love You


In light of Valentine's Day, I wanted to write about love.  "Love is a many splendid thing..." "Love lifts us up where we belong..." "All you need is love..."  


It is not really possible to give or receive love fully, until you learn to love yourself first. You may have heard this before, but it is really true. Whether you are spending Valentine's Day this year with someone you love, friends, or yourself, I hope you take a second to love yourself. 

"We spend so much of our time waiting to be loved, hoping love will find us, searching, yearning for that special love. Feeling empty and lost without it. Wanting someone to give us love and fill us up. Unfortunately, that’s not usually how life works. You will draw to you exactly what you create in life, and what you believe you are worthy of. So loving yourself can create love in your life. When you expect love from an external source, and someone or something does not fulfill your void and fantasy's, then you will feel worse than before." -wikiHow.com

We must first learn to love ourselves before we can truly feel fulfilled. So, while you are telling all of the other people in your life how important they are today and showing how much you love them, don't leave out one very important person, yourself.  

This was the first Valentine's Day in a long time that I was alone.  My husband was traveling so I ended up ordering Outback takeout and watching The Bachelor. What did you do this Valentine's Day? Feel free to post comments.

Are you S.A.D.?

What is SAD Anyway?


You may have heard of this disorder, and didn't think much of it. It affects between 4-6 % of the US population in a severe way. Many others are affected with more mild cases, and three quarters of SAD sufferers are women. It is most likely to affect women in their 20's, 30's, and 40"s.

"Seasonal affective disorder (SAD), also known as winter depression or winter blues, is a mood disorder in which people who have normal mental health throughout most of the year experience depressive symptoms in the winter, or, less frequently, in the summer, spring or autumn, repeatedly, year after year. In the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV), SAD is not a unique mood disorder, but is "a specifier of major depression".


"The US National Library of Medicine notes that "some people experience a serious mood change when the seasons change. They may sleep too much, have little energy, and may also feel depressed. Though symptoms can be severe, they usually clear up." The condition in the summer is often referred to as reverse seasonal affective disorder, and can also include heightened anxiety."  -Wikipedia

Common Symptoms

Symptoms of winter SAD include:

• Fatigue
• Increased need for sleep
• Decreased levels of energy
• Weight gain
• Increase in appetite
• Difficulty concentrating
• Increased desire to be alone

Symptoms of summer SAD include:

• Weight loss
• Trouble sleeping
• Decreased appetite

I'm SAD...

What Can I Do About IT?

There are several different treatments for classic (winter-based) seasonal affective disorder, including light therapy with bright lights or sunlight, ionized-air administration, anti-depressant medication, cognitive-behavioral therapy,  and carefully timed supplementation of the hormone melatonin. 

Though some of these treatments are proven to be effective, they can also be expensive and if possible should be used as a last resort. If you think you might be affected by SAD, perhaps you should try sitting on your back porch for 15 minutes a day or going for a little walk. Vitamin D which naturally comes from milk products and sunlight is essential to our bodies. Do what you can, even in the dreary winter months to soak up a few minutes of healing rays.

What is really going in in Egypt?

What's Really Going On:

Here is a quote from an article; Huffington Post, in NY

"After days of protest, Egypt's civil unrest came to a head today, with protestors defying curfews as the nation's military entered the streets. If you're new to the story, here's what's going on.

Protests started on Tuesday, January 25, when -- inspired by the successful revolution in Tunisia --thousands of people began taking to the streets to protest poverty, rampant unemployment, government corruption and autocratic governance of President Hosni Mubarak, who has ruled the country for thirty years. These were the first protests on such a large scale to be seen in Egypt since the 1970s. The government responded byblocking Twitter, which was being used by organizers to coordinate protests.

Blocking Twitter not only enraged Egyptian citizens; it also brought increased national attention to the uprising. Over the course of the next two days, Egypt proceeded to block Facebook while the much-hated riot police took to the streets, arresting and injuring hundreds with batons, tear gas water cannons. Protests occurred not only in Cairo, the capital, but also in Alexandria and Suez, two other major cities....

Additionally, the Muslim Brotherhood, long a fierce opponent of the Mubarak regime and officially banned in Egypt, threw their weight behind the protestors, many of whom are young, tech-savvy Egyptians, reports the New York Times. Two-thirds of Egypt's population has never known a leader other than Mubarak....

The largest protests were planned for Friday, at which point the government took the unprecedented step of blocking all Internet services in the country. With Twitter and Facebook already down, email other social networking outlets fell as well. Text messaging was also blocked. Protestors and journalists began finding alternate means of getting online and pushing out information..." - The Huffington Post, NY

To read more click original link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/01/28/whats-going-on-in-egypt_n_815734.html 

Women In Egypt

Here is a great article concerning women specifically in the Egygptian Protests:

http://www.pri.org/politics-society/women-in-the-egyptian-protests2614.html

"Women make up more than half of Egypt's university students. They are visible in the media and on the street; many work. But women rarely get the top posts in government or business. A woman's highest ambition is still expected to be to establish a family." 

- PRI Public Radio International

The Super Bowl Secret/Local Sex Offenders

Local News: 


Raleigh, NC Sex Offenders at Homeless Shelter

"Raleigh, NC - A downtown Raleigh Homeless Shelter is registered as the home of 40 sex offenders (including convicted rapists), but those sex offenders are not staying there every night." - NBC 17 News

To see the article and watch the video click: http://www2.nbc17.com/news/2011/feb/10/raleigh-homeless-shelter-registered-home-40-sex-of-ar-773159/ 

It is good to be informed. Here is a link where you can enter in your zip code to find sex offenders in your area. http://www.familywatchdog.us/ 

National News: 


The Super Bowl Secret

While most of us were having fun last weekend chowing down on chili, chips and dip, something else was going on that you should know about.

It is easy to think that human sex trafficking is mostly a problem somewhere overseas. It is a proven fact that American businessmen are the majority of clientele for human trafficking worldwide. It is also a known fact that human sex trafficking statistics skyrocket during the Super Bowl each year. Although exact statistics are not available, it is estimated that tens of thousands of people (mostly under-aged girls) are commercially sexually exploited in Super Bowl host cities right here in the U.S.

To read articles about the trafficking and the Super Bowl......

Click on a current 2011 link from USA Today:
http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2011-01-31-child-prostitution-super-bowl_N.htm

Click on a current 2011 link from Newsweek:
http://www.newsweek.com/2011/01/30/the-super-bowl-of-sex-trafficking.html#


"He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners..." Is. 61:2

Walk Like a Lady, Write Like a Man

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

Aretha Franklin said it best, "R.E.S.P.E.C.T....Find out what it means to me."  What does it mean to you? Or better yet, what does it mean, to not be respected as a woman?

To put it bluntly, most women suck at speaking up for themselves. Whether you are too timid or too bold, there is a fine line when it comes to commanding respect. Most of us fall into one of these two categories: we either don't stand up for ourselves enough and resent ourselves later for it, or we make a fool of ourselves trying to demand respect and regret it later.

Once you feel you have been disrespected, you have to ask yourself: is it better to say nothing at all, or take the risk and defend yourself. As with any risk, there can and will be consequences. Whether the outcome will be negative or positive depends ultimately on  your approach to the situation.

Softly Playing Hard Ball:

By no means have I mastered this art. In fact, coming from a family with very strong men, (and women, for that matter), I have had to learn and am still learning the right way, the hard way. I write out of experience, probably more of what not to do, in hopes of helping you achieve the best results of standing up for yourself in a situation where there has been a disregard for your person-hood.

If you don't say anything at all, you risk the chance that you will not be respected in the future. If you say it in an overbearingly way (out of emotion), you risk not being respected in the future. When it comes to dealing with men, the key is to stand up for yourself in a firm but feminine way. Why firm? Because you want to get your point across. Why feminine? Because you are not a man, and therefore are not expected to be a man. That's right. You are not expected to be a man, but when dealing with men in communication, you will achieve far better results if you can learn how to communicate on their terms. That is why, if you can retain your femininity while not being overly emotional, what you have to say will be received well.

Business with the Big Boys: 

So why should we have to conform? I remember when my boss called me into his office and said that he had a suggestion for my email writings. I was ready for him to point out some grammatical or spelling error. Instead, he said, "Tiffany, you need to learn how to write like a man." "Write like a man???" I asked. I could feel my blood pressure rising. Then he pointed out where I said in my email, "I am happy to set up the meeting for the three of us." I was referring to a three-way conference call with a couple of big clients. He said, "Not I would be happy to. I plan to.... I plan to set up the meeting." I left the meeting furious. It wasn't fair that I was being corrected for something as stupid as this. What was my work performance based on anyway? Apparently it mattered more that I communicate like a man, than if I misspelled a word, or put a semicolon in the wrong place. Why should I be expected to wear a skirt, and walk like a lady, yet write like a man?

It was in that moment it dawned on me, just how much we really do live in a man's world. I saw for probably the first time that I could not change every single man out there, I could only change myself. Unless he worked for a marketing company and was working on a Dove advertising campaign, a man would simply never be asked to "write more like a woman." So plain and simple, this is the dilemma we are up against. Though I walked away resenting him for it, unfortunately my boss was right. If we are to get ahead in the business world, women must learn to write, and speak like men.

So there you have it. Over-emotionalize, and risk being tuned-out completely. Over-authorize and risk being called a Femi-natzi. Especially in the work place. Good luck Ladies!

Has anyone else had to deal with this sort of thing? Please post your thoughts.

Barefoot and Pregnant

Vulnerability Through Childbearing

I find it interesting that women by default are considered the more vulnerable gender. You might disagree with me on this one, but I believe that though there are several reasons for this, it all starts with the fact that we are the ones who are able to bear children. Women are the only ones who are able to be "knocked up" and are therefore more vulnerable. Let's face it. When a man and a woman have relations, the man basically has a choice whether he wants to be involved in the baby's life or not because he is not physically attached to the fetus. The woman however, doesn't have that choice because she has now transformed from one being into two.

I realize this would be the perfect time to talk about it, but right now, I don't want to discuss the abortion/adoption issue. This posting is about something else....

Why Eve, did you just have to eat that darn apple? 

I have asked myself a time or two why Eve did it. After all, isn't this is where gender issues really started? "To the woman He (God) said, "I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; In pain you shall bring forth children; Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you."" (Genesis 3:16)

There is a lot packed into this one little verse. We could pick it apart piece by piece but instead I want to focus on one part, "Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you". Perhaps we could generalize it and say that women will always be the ones on the reciprocating end of the relationship, "waiting with desire" as opposed to the male aggressors. We could also look at this from the angle of which men will always be physically stronger, or that women will always be the more needy, vulnerable sex. Again, some of you may disagree with me as there are always exceptions, but though we may not always like it, in general the curse plays out.

"Barefoot and Pregnant"

Those who are closest to me know that my relationship with my father is much better these days than it once was. After six back surgeries, thousands of dollars later, and years of not being able to physically provide for our family, my father became a very angry man when I was young. One time when I was late for school, and out of rage over a boyfriend I had, my father said to me, "One day you are going to end up barefoot and pregnant with some guy from the sticks of Oklahoma! What kind of life will you have then?" I wasn't even sexually active with the boy. My dad just didn't like him. Perhaps he said this because there is a part of him that has always resented where he himself came from. With tears in his eyes my dad would tell us stories of how their family moved out west and kids would tease him and call him the "country coody-boy." I know now, that though the approach was wrong in every way possible, my dad just wanted the best for me. He wanted me to grow up, go to college, have a successful life, and marry a successful man. My dad has since apologized for the harshness while I was growing up and thankfully our relationship has come miles.

I wanted to share this personal story about myself and my father for a reason. One, it gives you some insight to what I experienced as a young girl, and two it brings me to my main point. For my teenage years, I lived with the secret fear that I would become this "barefoot and pregnant" type of girl, and it played a huge part in developing or under-developing my self-esteem. It seems this is a constant issue that young girls are up against around the globe. Though it may be a long time since you were a teenager, I know I am not the only female who at one point feared this exact same thing and for some it has become a reality. I know a few girls in fact, who got pregnant in high school and in the end chose to have the baby. These are some of the bravest women I know.

Are Women Really the Weaker Sex?

On that note....To bring life into this world is not only a miracle. It is a true gift that only women will naturally have the reward of experiencing. I find it interesting that our greatest gift as women can also be what makes us most vulnerable.  Our sexuality and the ability to have children is often an area of conflict in life and something that lends itself to some of our deepest fears. This is undeniably the case with rape. Again, our greatest strength (ability to have children) can lead to a dramatically life-changing outcome, which results in women being the more vulnerable sex.

While we may be the more vulnerable, are women truly the weaker sex? Some would argue that we are. Other people will defend that we are not. I don't have the answer to this, nor do I believe it is really relevant. What is relevant, is the fact that, until men are miraculously able to carry a child in their womb for 9 months, inevitably most of the world does see, and will always see women as the weaker sex.

Some would say, as women, it is out of our vulnerability that we are weaker. Others would argue that it is out of our vulnerability therein-lies our unique power. More on this later....

Vulnerability of women - the fall - Eve, childbearing, pregnancy

Modern Day Prisioners

The Outrageous Girl in the Shop

I was in a North Raleigh restaurant, the kind with the store connected.  "Hello. Help you?" She asked. "Yes, I was just wondering where the baklava is." I replied. "Oh Yes! Over here." The young dark Middle-Eastern woman led me to a semi-dusty shelf filled with boxes with sweet pistachio and honey goodness. "Your hair is beautiful." I said, noticing her silky black mane. She was the only female working  in the shop without a burqa on. "So, I have to ask....why? Why aren't you wearing a burqa?" I whispered. She peered deeply at me with her black shy eyes, and finally her perched mouth cracked a half grin. Then in her broken English, the young clerk explained to me it was because she didn't want to. "You mean, you just don't want to, so you don't have to? So, you mean you never wear one?" I asked. I was way too outgoing for this quiet little place. She laughed, "No, no. I wear outside. Just not here." "Wow!" I whispered loudly, "Good for you! Your hair is too beautiful to be hidden anyway." I walked out the door thanking her for the help. It was then I realized that though I did not know her at all, I knew I had met a woman I had deep respect for. She was one of the most quiet people I had ever met, yet she was one of the most outrageous.

What was she risking? What did her husband think? How come she was somehow not required to hide most of herself and the other women in the store were? What if all Muslim women banished burqas? A part of me wishes I could wave my magic wand and make them all disappear. Seriously, what would happen if all the Muslim women in the world were to banish the wearing of burqas? There would probably be an uproar.

Surprisingly, not all women hate wearing them, like the girl in the shop.  Due to traditional customs and religious beliefs, most Muslim women seem to not mind them. When I was in Malaysia, I asked a few of the girls with head coverings about it, and they seemed to think it wasn't an option to not wear them. It just simply wasn't an option, so they don't think about it. That is the problem I have with burqas. It is not about the religion or the tradition. It is the control. The lack of options and the lack of an ability for these women to be free to think for themselves.

Malaysian Insight

Some of the girls and women in Malaysia told me that they wear really trendy clothing underneath. They wear beautiful lingerie and all the latest fashions. They paint their nails and invest in the best clothing, but it is only for their husbands. They told me how they only need to be beautiful for him, and at home they can show their face, hair, and clothing. These women also told me that it does get really hot under there, especially for the extreme traditionalists who wear all black in 100 plus degree weather. But even with the heat, and the constrained nature of burqas, those women seemed to brush my question off. When I asked them if they ever wanted to not wear their burqas, it was as if I were asking if all the grass in the world could magically turn blue. It seemed completely ridiculous to them and simply not fathomable. After all, it has been ingrained into these women from such a young age, and all their friends are doing it.

Clothing or Identity?

It is as if the burqa is a part of them and they have accepted it as a part of who they are. Which brings me to another question. Is a burqa then, something that is just worn, or is it truly a part of their identity as women? Or is there any identity at all, in terms of differentiation, when you cannot tell one's beautiful face from the next? Oh, if I could wave my magic wand and change the grass to blue....

Current Events: A Matter Of Law

In September 2010, the wearing of burqas was officially outlawed in France.

Here is a link to an article from CNN World:
http://articles.cnn.com/2010-09-14/world/france.burqa.ban_1_burqa-overt-religious-symbols-ban-last-year?_s=PM:WORLD

"He has sent me...to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair." Is. 61:3