Sexual Harassment In The Workplace

"The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) describes sexual harassment as a form of gender discrimination that is in violation of Title VII of the 1964 Civil Rights Act.  In 1998, the U.S. Supreme Court made employers more liable for sexual harassment of their employees.  Moreover, 

The Society for Human Resource Management has reported  that 62% of companies now offer sexual 

harassment prevention training programs, and 97% have a written sexual harassment policy.

Below is a brief listing of recent harassment statistics.  However, it is important to point out that these only discuss formal complaints, and that the vast number of sexual harassment situations go unreported.

A telephone poll by Louis Harris and Associates on 782 U.S. workers revealed:

• 31% of the female workers reported they had been harassed at work
• 7% of the male workers reported they had been harassed at work
  
• 62% of targets took no action
  
• 100% of women reported the harasser was a man

Of the women who had been harassed:

• 43% were harassed by a supervisor
  
• 27% were harassed by an employee senior to them
  
• 19% were harassed by a coworker at their level
  
• 8% were harassed by a junior employee

Sexual harassment is unwanted and  unwelcome behavior, or attention, of a sexual nature that interferes with your life and your ability to function at work, home, or school.  Sexual advances, forced sexual activity, statements about sexual orientation or sexuality, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature all constitute sexual harassment.  The behavior may be direct or implied.  Sexual harassment can affect an individual's work or school performance, and can create an intimidating, hostile, or offensive environment."

Information provided by: sexualharassmentsupport.org

Getting Personal


I recently received a letter in the mail stating that a case I had to file nine months ago with the EOC (Employment Opportunity Commission) has been denied.


I am sure you have seen those sexual harassment commercials on TV, and like me you probably always thought it would never happen to you. Unfortunately I was wrong. Out of respect for my previous co-workers, I will not disclose the name of my boss, or the name of the company I used to work for. Basically a while back, I lost my job because I confronted my boss about sexual harassment. 


Taking a Huge Risk


There were many things that he did and said that made all of us women in the office feel uncomfortable. In fact, I eventually typed up ten pages of various events of sexual harassment in order to file the case with the EOC. These included things that he would say to me and the other women I worked with. Keep in mind that this is a man in his 60's who seems to hire only young, white, females. There is a tremendously high turnover rate at this small company. In fact, I learned after accepting the job, that the year before I started, there were ELEVEN women in my position before me. I was there just under a year, and based on the high turnover rate I am surprised that I lasted that long. 

I prefer not to get into details, but finally my boss's behavior went too far. My husband was at the point that if I didn't say anything, he would have gone into my boss's office and would have given him a piece of his mind. The next day, when I actually got the gumption to talk to him about his inappropriate behavior, I was forced to resign that afternoon. 

Interestingly enough, there was a new lawyer on staff at the time who knew how I and all of the other girls felt. When we told her some of the things that he had said, she noted how disgusting he was and how he always stared at her chest. When I told her about his recent behavior, she recommended that I write every single word and event down dating each one, just in case I ever "needed it." So that is exactly what I did. 


Now, perhaps in order to keep her job, it is my understanding according to the paperwork I received, that the same young lawyer is currently representing him and his company. Do I judge her? Again, no. Who am I to judge anyone, unless I walk a day in their shoes?  I can tell you that I disagree with her contradicting behavior and that I don't necessarily respect this behavior. But she is just another woman trying to find her way in what often seems, a man's world. Each of us have had to develop our own coping mechanisms.


Loosing More Than A Job


On the day I was forced to resign, I felt as though none of my co-workers stood by me. I specifically remember asking one of them as I was leaving why she wasn't saying anything, and she pointed to the other girls and said, "They're not saying anything either." They had all talked about the inappropriate things he would say, and they would all say how uncomfortable he made them feel. Unfortunately, when it came down to it, apparently I was the only one willing to stand up to him about it. When I left that day, I felt not only shocked at what had happened, but shocked that none of my co-workers, people who I considered close friends, would stand by me. I felt ultimately betrayed. 


I understand now, that it wasn't personal and that each of my female co-workers had to make choices for themselves. Perhaps they were bothered enough to talk about it weekly (even daily) among all of us girls, but it didn't bother them enough to risk loosing their job over it. I am not in any of their shoes, so though I may not understand or agree, I do not judge them. Regardless, it hurt me deeply. A few of these girls were friends that I would hang out with outside of work. Friends that have had me to dinner at their house and vice versa. In this process, I not only lost a job and a paycheck in a crappy economy, but I felt that I had lost my good friends. I am thankful that my friendship has since continued with one of the women still working there, and two others who no longer work there.


The Result


So I filed a complaint with the EOC. Now, nine months later I am finding out that because there are less than 15 employees at this company, my case is being denied. Apparently there is a state law that says a company must have 15 or more employees in order for them to pursue your EOC case. Apparently it is not worth their time and resources, since it is not a big enough company. I have spoken with lawyers who have considered taking my case and would perhaps be great at representing me. This is something I have considered, but I honestly am glad the whole thing is over.  


For the time being, I know that it would be really easy to write bad remarks on this blog, bashing my old boss or his company. That is something that most women might do, but I have more integrity than that and I don't see any good coming out of it.  I ultimately have to trust that God is my defender.

Was It Worth It?

I have since asked myself if it was worth risking my job in order to stand up for myself. The answer is yes, without a doubt in my mind. Though I was extremely upset that day, I left that place with my head held high. I left with self respect. I had done something incredible, I had taken a stand. Not only for myself, but for the other women I worked with, and for women in general. 

Thankfully, now I have a wonderful job with an excellent company. I have an exciting stress-free position with a respectable company that I never would have had if I was still stuck working in that miserable atmosphere. My husband has stood by me every step of the way and though it has been anything but easy for us, financially and emotionally, I have learned a lot. Looking back, I honestly can't say that I would do anything different. Though I would never want to go through such a traumatizing experience again, I know that I did the best I could with the situation I was dealt and I feel an enormous sense of self respect.

I learned a huge lesson that day. I learned that though it is 2011 and we have come a long way, unfortunately women still have miles to go in the area of equality. I learned that in the workplace it still may be required for a woman to keep quiet and not rock the boat, in order to keep a necessary paycheck. I also learned that a woman can speak up for herself and risk loosing her job, but gain so much more in return.

I hope you are encouraged by my story. I would love to know your thoughts. (It is easy to post, all you have to do is click "comments" and post.)


"But God is my Helper. The Lord is my Defender." Ps. 54:4